Life offers us lessons in the most unexpected situations—but only if we are open to seeing them.
Just a few weeks ago, I spent a beautiful Saturday afternoon tackling a project I had long been dreading and avoiding— power washing my deck. A project I thought I would chip away at over the course of several weeks turned into a five-hour reflection. That reflection not only motivated me to make significant progress on the deck, but it also inspired 10 life lessons that I’d like to share with you:
Lesson #1: Avoidance does not solve problems.
I had avoided the deck power-washing project for three years, and had allowed the grime to accumulate on the deck surfaces and furniture to the point that they were not useable. How many times have we avoided problems in our lives, hoping they would magically get better on their own? Today is the day to start tackling whatever you have been avoiding.
Lesson #2: Use the right tools.
Wanting to avoid learning to use a power washer, I started my deck-cleaning project with a bucket, a brush and a bottle of bleach. While these are excellent tools for other purposes, I quickly learned that they were not going to get the job done—at least not in this lifetime. In life, we attempt to solve a problem with old or inadequate tools. Find the right combination of skills and tools so you can successfully achieve your personal goals (while also keeping your sanity).
Lesson #3: Seek the advice of a professional
Once I resigned myself to using the power washer for this project, I headed to the hardware store with only a photo of my power washer in hand. I didn’t even know if it was operated by gas or electric. A kind associate taught me how to assemble and operate the power washer by referencing only my picture. All of us learn differently. Some of us need one-on-one guidance on the tools to use in life, while others learn best by reading instructions or watching a video. To increase your likelihood of seeing the best results with the least effort, know your most effective learning method for achieving your personal goals.
Lesson #4: Set small goals
When I finally got the power washer running, I was unimpressed with the narrow stream of water. It was going to take forever to complete the job. So I decided to begin with a side table, followed by the seating area next to it. When I made my goals small, I started to see progress and was encouraged as I completed each one. Achieving our small goals in life one at a time is the path to transformation. Take a moment to set a small goal for yourself today. What will it be?
Lesson #5: Celebrate small victories
It was discouraging to see how much more of the deck still had to be done, and fatigue and exhaustion were starting to set in. But when I looked back at the area I had completed, I was amazed and encouraged by how beautiful it looked. Taking breaks to celebrate victories, even the small ones, is an important motivator for continued progress. Write down an accomplishment you achieved in the last week or month and celebrate it.
Lesson #6: Document where you started
Once I began to see the results of my effort, I took a picture of the deck so I would not forget what it looked like when I first started. That reminded me of revisiting a worksheet I completed as a HeartMath student, which was a snapshot of my emotional life at the time. Looking back on that worksheet helps me to appreciate the progress I’ve made, and is a moment of celebration. Take the time to pause and record the current state of your life, so you can look back and appreciate your progress.
Lesson #7: Perfection doesn’t matter
After taking a picture, I noticed a few spots on the completed part of the deck that I had missed. I had to decide if I wanted to use my time to perfect those spots, or continue to move forward. I decided that for me, progress meant more than perfection. No decision is better than another, as long as we are managing our energy as a precious resource. Recognize where in your life you are sacrificing good enough for perfect.
Lesson #8: Change takes time
After five hours, I was still not done. I was happy with my progress but I was beginning to feel tired and the air was getting cool. I realized that it took three years to accumulate that dirt and grime, and it was not going to be removed in one day. I set my last small goal and called it a day. That’s okay. Whatever improvement project you are working on, be gentle with yourself. Listen to your body, your heart, and your intuition. Find a good stopping point and continue tomorrow.
Lesson #9: Adjust your approach
I began power washing by spraying the stream directly on top of the deck boards at a 90-degree angle, and progress was slow. By accident, I hit a plank at a 45-degree angle and saw the dirt moved faster and easier. In Sound Therapy, we use vibration to push sound gently through an area. We don’t apply sound forcefully to the area of concern. When we are addressing a behavioral pattern, progress may be slow when we focus on the pattern itself. Instead, reveal the beauty and true nature of your spirit by focusing on your assets and how to use them to address the root of the issue at hand.
Lesson #10: Life is messy
Although I prepared for the power-washing job by wearing rain pants, a rain jacket, and crocks, I was a wet and smelly mess by the time I was done. We prepare as best as we can for the obstacles life brings, but sometimes it’s just messy. If I hadn’t prepared at all, I would have become soaked sooner, and too cold to make the progress I did make. Accept the obstacles and challenges you must go through to accomplish your personal goals, even if it’s a difficult road to get there.
These lessons serve as the foundation of what we do at Integro. No matter what stage you are in with your own personal “power-washing” wellness project, I encourage you to apply these lessons to the process. And if you need support, encouragement or guidance along the way, we at Integro are here to help you through it. Life offers us lessons in the most unexpected situations—but only if we are open to seeing them.
Just a few weeks ago, I spent a beautiful Saturday afternoon tackling a project I had long been dreading and avoiding— power washing my deck. A project I thought I would chip away at over the course of several weeks turned into a five-hour reflection. That reflection not only motivated me to make significant progress on the deck, but it also inspired 10 life lessons that I’d like to share with you:
Lesson #1: Avoidance does not solve problems.
I had avoided the deck power-washing project for three years, and had allowed the grime to accumulate on the deck surfaces and furniture to the point that they were not useable. How many times have we avoided problems in our lives, hoping they would magically get better on their own? Today is the day to start tackling whatever you have been avoiding.
Lesson #2: Use the right tools.
Wanting to avoid learning to use a power washer, I started my deck-cleaning project with a bucket, a brush and a bottle of bleach. While these are excellent tools for other purposes, I quickly learned that they were not going to get the job done—at least not in this lifetime. In life, we attempt to solve a problem with old or inadequate tools. Find the right combination of skills and tools so you can successfully achieve your personal goals (while also keeping your sanity).
Lesson #3: Seek the advice of a professional
Once I resigned myself to using the power washer for this project, I headed to the hardware store with only a photo of my power washer in hand. I didn’t even know if it was operated by gas or electric. A kind associate taught me how to assemble and operate the power washer by referencing only my picture. All of us learn differently. Some of us need one-on-one guidance on the tools to use in life, while others learn best by reading instructions or watching a video. To increase your likelihood of seeing the best results with the least effort, know your most effective learning method for achieving your personal goals.
Lesson #4: Set small goals
When I finally got the power washer running, I was unimpressed with the narrow stream of water. It was going to take forever to complete the job. So I decided to begin with a side table, followed by the seating area next to it. When I made my goals small, I started to see progress and was encouraged as I completed each one. Achieving our small goals in life one at a time is the path to transformation. Take a moment to set a small goal for yourself today. What will it be?
Lesson #5: Celebrate small victories
It was discouraging to see how much more of the deck still had to be done, and fatigue and exhaustion were starting to set in. But when I looked back at the area I had completed, I was amazed and encouraged by how beautiful it looked. Taking breaks to celebrate victories, even the small ones, is an important motivator for continued progress. Write down an accomplishment you achieved in the last week or month and celebrate it.
Lesson #6: Document where you started
Once I began to see the results of my effort, I took a picture of the deck so I would not forget what it looked like when I first started. That reminded me of revisiting a worksheet I completed as a HeartMath student, which was a snapshot of my emotional life at the time. Looking back on that worksheet helps me to appreciate the progress I’ve made, and is a moment of celebration. Take the time to pause and record the current state of your life, so you can look back and appreciate your progress.
Lesson #7: Perfection doesn’t matter
After taking a picture, I noticed a few spots on the completed part of the deck that I had missed. I had to decide if I wanted to use my time to perfect those spots, or continue to move forward. I decided that for me, progress meant more than perfection. No decision is better than another, as long as we are managing our energy as a precious resource. Recognize where in your life you are sacrificing good enough for perfect.
Lesson #8: Change takes time
After five hours, I was still not done. I was happy with my progress but I was beginning to feel tired and the air was getting cool. I realized that it took three years to accumulate that dirt and grime, and it was not going to be removed in one day. I set my last small goal and called it a day. That’s okay. Whatever improvement project you are working on, be gentle with yourself. Listen to your body, your heart, and your intuition. Find a good stopping point and continue tomorrow.
Lesson #9: Adjust your approach
I began power washing by spraying the stream directly on top of the deck boards at a 90-degree angle, and progress was slow. By accident, I hit a plank at a 45-degree angle and saw the dirt moved faster and easier. In Sound Therapy, we use vibration to push sound gently through an area. We don’t apply sound forcefully to the area of concern. When we are addressing a behavioral pattern, progress may be slow when we focus on the pattern itself. Instead, reveal the beauty and true nature of your spirit by focusing on your assets and how to use them to address the root of the issue at hand.
Lesson #10: Life is messy
Although I prepared for the power-washing job by wearing rain pants, a rain jacket, and crocks, I was a wet and smelly mess by the time I was done. We prepare as best as we can for the obstacles life brings, but sometimes it’s just messy. If I hadn’t prepared at all, I would have become soaked sooner, and too cold to make the progress I did make. Accept the obstacles and challenges you must go through to accomplish your personal goals, even if it’s a difficult road to get there.
These lessons serve as the foundation of what we do at Integro. No matter what stage you are in with your own personal “power-washing” wellness project, I encourage you to apply these lessons to the process. And if you need support, encouragement or guidance along the way, we at Integro are here to help you through it.
[vc_row][vc_column css=".vc_custom_1548794786584{background-position: center !important;background-repeat: no-repeat !important;background-size: cover !important;}"][vc_single_image image="4079" alignment="center"][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]When I’m teaching and facilitating, sometimes people are surprised when I share my personal struggles. They are part of my story, my growth, and my current success. I also share them because my objective is not to always be ok (whatever your definition of 'ok' is). Sometimes the fact that we notice we are not ok and knowing that we will be is the success.
Last Saturday, I felt drained and exhausted. Many other emotions rose and I was not “ok”. I became aware and chose to accept the torrent of emotions at the time. Accepting draining emotions and the vulnerability of feeling them provided me with the opportunity to practice something outside of my normal pattern: I asked for help! By sharing with a friend, who did an amazing job at listening through her heart, I realized that I was feeling how I felt every day just 4 years ago. At that time the world saw a perfect life and I was definitively not ok. The moment that I became aware that feeling this way felt strange and not normal I started feeling better. My new normal is so filled with joy, connection, authenticity, and love that feeling disconnected and alone was news to share!
Had I felt the obligation to be 'ok' and force calm or balance into my emotional experience, I would have lost the opportunity to practice vulnerability. I would have missed the celebration and appreciation of my growth, my friends, and my new skills. I trusted my heart's guidance to allow me to experience not being 'ok' and because of that, I am doing great.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]
Why do I fear? The what ifs, the ideas, the stories, the insecurities and the nakedness of revealing myself to others. Standing in the room was the easy part. The hard part was to pick the date and put the announcement out. Then, I had six weeks of hearing my old stories telling me: “nobody is coming”.
For most of my professional life, important decisions, meetings and speaking engagements generated a great level of anxiety. I prepared with fear of failure front and center in my mind. While I seemed confident and competent, I doubted myself. Once finished, I would replay in my head every word, every answer and would find something wrong, something I could have done or said better. This fear generated a great deal of stress at best or worst, stopped me from pursuing many opportunities and taking risks.
Why do we fear? Fear is a normal chemical and electric response of our body to protect us from threats. It is designed to keep us alive. Most of us do not face life threatening situations on a daily basis. However, many situations in our lives trigger the same biological response because we perceive them as threats to our beliefs, status, self-image, security, expectations, etc. A test, a work situation, conflict, or any event that is perceived as threatening triggers this response draining significant physical and emotional energy. Fear precipitates a burst of focused energy to allow us to react to threat. When we experience this drain of energy frequently or for a sustained period of time, the result is an abnormal increase of stress hormones that affects our physical, emotional and mental health.
What to do? For the most part, we cannot change the situations that trigger fear. We can change our perceptions and emotional response to the situations and to fear itself. The following strategies alone or in combination have proven to be effective to increase our ability to do that:
- Breathing exercises: Certain techniques have shown to decrease the amount of stress related chemicals in the body and at the same time increase renewing chemicals that increase your ability to self-regulate emotional response.
- Mindfulness: Observe your fear with curiosity. Which judgement of yourself or others are triggering this response? What story are you telling yourself? By looking into the ‘why’ from a more neutral place, we can question if our perception is valid. Moving from participant to observer is in itself a transformative emotional experience.
- Meditation practices: Recent studies have shown that regular meditation practice, as little as 5-10 minutes a day, results in measurable physical changes to the brain and our ability to respond to stress.
- Essential oils: Aromatic compounds found in certain essential oils, such as lavender, chamomile, vetiver, and frankincense, have the ability to interrupt the chemical signals associated with fear and anxiety promoting a sense of calm and relaxation.
- Physical activity: regular physical activity, especially when compresses large joints, increases the sense of well-being, focus and emotional self-regulation.
For HeartMath trademarks go to www.heartmath.com/trademarks.
He shattered the clay vases and proclaimed we were all ‘broken.’ That day, during the sermon of Eastern 2016, it became clear to me. I heard the Spirit. I was not broken; nobody in that room was broken. I have been created perfect! The pastor was proclaiming the same distorted thinking than my physician training evoked: the false illusion that there is something wrong with us that needs fixing. I was called to restore people’s connection to the perfection that already resides within them and to each other.
The word ‘restore’ kept coming to mind when thinking about a name for this vision of a different wellness model. I looked up the Latin word for “restore” and received back a long list of possibilities. As a scroll down the list, the word Integro immediately call my attention. It summarizes so much about my journey and my vision. In Spanish and English, integro is the root for words that mean a moral standard, bringing things together and connect them into one and a mathematical term for whole numbers. An integer is a whole number, a number that is not a fraction…. not broken. One word that represents the same in the two languages that I speak; that has a moral and philosophical meaning; and that speaks to the universal language of math (I know…I am a geek!)
So here it is Integro. A system of health that aims to remind you of your wholeness; to provide a variety of tools, supported by cutting edge science, with integrity, passion and love; and to honor the journey and remind you that you are not alone but connected. A model of care that helps bring your body, mind and spirit into balance to allow for the expression of the best of you…. the perfect you.
Be empowered to remember your wholeness and restore your perfection.
I am not a healer!
While at first this may seem like a contradiction, please allow me to explain. To me, the word “heal” means to return a broken something to the way it was before it was broken. This implies that we are going backward in a process, rather then forward. That something damaged is being repaired.
For instance, when you break a bone and you want it to heal, you want it to go back the way it was before it was impacted by trauma. To fix it.
In contrast, I look at what I do as facilitating forward movement and expansion, helping clients to remember their wholeness and restore perfection. In this process, we are not going back to the way it was 'before everything got messed up', or to the familiar comfort of yesterday and what we have always known.
I see all people as inherently perfect beings moving forward in the growing process of being human. And so, I am not a healer, and I do not advocate going backwards.
I am a facilitator of a process, your process. A process of remembering a natural state that, when reached and sustained, allows a person to live from a place of inner balance; and to integrate all that they have experienced as part of their own magnificence.
And so, when I play the Shuniya Tibetan bowls over and around a client's body, it is not to fix them, but to remind their system of its native tuning, which is perfect.
When I facilitate Holographic Memory Resolution, it is not to rewind the tape and take the client back to how they were before the trauma, but rather to help their system remember how to process emotions and release memories from storage in the body, thus restoring the perfect order that is natural to the system.
We live in this resilient yet fragile human vessel, and like an egg, it can crack. But, we are not supposed to 'heal' the egg; it has cracked so that the hatchling may be released and expand into a new way of being. Are you ready to break free?
